Physically safe - but you’re gonna get sassed to within an inch of your life.
3x
Can we do 2 adult men and a bear?
At the same time?
It’s the Internet, we can do anything.
Harry Houdini, Angus MacGyver, and James Randi
I think all of them are dead, I’m not sure I will be safe with a bunch of dead people in the elevator
LOTR spoiler
Aragorn is dead too!
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Hate to be contrary but I’d think you couldn’t be safer if they were all dead
Richard Dean Anderson/MacGyver/General O’Neil is alive.
Don’t scare me like that!
His first name is Angus?
Three guys wearing a red shirt
three clones of tom scott, who say “we are standing in an elevator going to the 5th floor” in perfect unison as you enter
Sourced from the island of Tom Scotts.
My two older brothers and my dad
Figures that the safest men to be stuck with aren’t human men.
Aragorn?
He’s 87 years old at the start of LOTR.
He descends from Elros the Half-Elf.Yeah, but that just makes him a much-better-than-average human.
He’s got Elven heritage. He’s the 64th descendant of Elros, brother of Elrond. I think he’s also decendend from a Maiar as Elros and Elrond’s great great grandmother was Melian.
Honestly if I was a woman any dude in life. Maybe even those goth dudes on black horses. Def the trees tho. They Hott af
I tried to come up with a counter argument and realized pretty quickly that I didn’t want to.
I mean, they’re objectively correct.
What’s the counter-argument ? Let’s hear it
Is the elevator spacious?
Ok I recognise Andre and Arnold, who’s the dude on the left?
Wilt Chamberlain.
The only NBA player to individually score 100 points in a game.
I can’t believe how jacked Arnold is here. It’s truly remarkable.
Thats not even his peak, he was more jacked as Hercules and in the first Terminator film imo, before his movie career.
True that.
Arnold’s got a decent number of allegations against him, but Andre would protect you so I guess it’s honestly a freebie for the other two if he’s in the mix.
Andre was a sweetheart, but a famous alcoholic. You’d have to worry about him passing out drunk. You don’t want to get crushed by a 500 pound teddy bear in a small space.
There’s a story of him passing out drunk in a hotel bar and the staff just having to let him stay the night where he fell because they couldn’t move him.
I’d choose: Boromir, Ned Stark, and Sean Bean.
No way anything bad can happen to me with those magnets around.
I dunno. Might take Sharpe instead of Ned Stark, good to have someone that knows how to use a rifle
The whole elevator would just crash through the foundation. You’d be collateral when Death gets a 3 for 1 final destination style.
Jᴀᴄᴋᴘᴏᴛ.
Nah, I think it’d go more like this:
- Get it in the elevator and see them all in there.
- Go to press the button for your floor (the top floor) and see that it’s already pressed.
- Have a pleasant trip up.
- Arrive at your floor and the doors open.
- All three politely allow you to exit first.
- Step out of the lift safely.
- Elevator malfunctions, plummets and crashes through the foundation.
- Walk off thinking how nice they all were.
Everywhere they went people were getting kidnapped, orcs were invading, trees were coming to life, and the dead were rising. Id want to be far away from that elevator.
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You take that back, I protect my marines while playing!
You know… As much as possible while charging headfirst into the most powerful empire the galaxy has seen in 100,000 years hell bent on destroying humanity and all we represent…
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Look bro, I just handed you an entire SPNKR rocket launcher and a Scorpion jump seat, whatever you do with those afterward is no longer my concern. I’m busy driving.
You know for a fact that they’ll literally coming charging across the countryside to rescue you though
Not much countryside for the charging in most elevators, though 🤔
They probably wouldn’t be that familiar with the workings of a lift either
Only one of them.
But Legolas could poke out the ceiling panel with the tip of his bow and Aragorn could boost Gimli up with a rope.
Not if yer a fucken orc!
So ackshually…
Aragorn was descended from Elros who was a half-elf, but that was so long ago he may or may not be a full man depending on how racist one is about miscegenation.
Legolas was an elf and Gimli was a dwarf, so explicitly not Men.
How about Eomer and Faramir instead?
Elros and Elrond had a choice as to become Eldar or Edain. Elrond chose Eldar, while Elros chose Edain. Once they chose their mixed nature was resolved.
Not exactly, since the Númenóreans still had longer lives than Men due to their elven heritage. So while one could absolutely make the argument they were Men, there’s also a case to be made saying they weren’t pureblooded Men.
one drop
Boromir would’ve made them feel safer.
Faramir didn’t try to take the Ring from Frodo, unlike Boromir.
Boromir literally picked the ring up and handed it back to Frodo. He was tested and passed.
The Fellowship broke apart because Boromir tried to take the Ring from Frodo at Amon Hen and Frodo used it to disappear and run from him.
The Fellowship broke apart because it wasn’t strong enough to make the journey. It never was. Bormir is the reason that the Ringbearer was able to make it away from the Fellowship’s camp and eventually to Mordor.
He was a hero. He lived as one and died as one.
Men as in males, yes.
Men as in humans, mostly no
Somewhat related: that’s a dream blunt rotation right there
I feel like Gimli would hog it, Aragorn would obviously be awesome, and Legolas would be chill but you could tell he’s thinking your weed sucks, he’s got a much better connection.
i like to imagine that weed is the opposite of beer when it comes to elves and dwarves, elves barely even notice while dwarves start giggling when standing next to someone puffing a blunt
Oh and hobbits would of course treat it like something abjectly holy, they already take pipeweed extremely seriously and that’s just tobacco. Actual devil’s lettuce might well start hobbit cults.
Gimli, it’s a blunt, not a microphone
