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Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netBanned from community to 196@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish · 6 个月前

Corn rule

slrpnk.net

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Corn rule

slrpnk.net

Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netBanned from community to 196@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish · 6 个月前
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  • nickwitha_k (he/him)@lemmy.sdf.org
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    6 个月前

    Because the undigested corn kernel husks are filled with poop.

    • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netBanned from communityOP
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      6 个月前

      TIL I’m corn because I’m full of shit

      • StupidBrotherInLaw@lemmy.world
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        6 个月前

        If that’s true, I’m an entire cob.

      • Trailblazing Braille Taser@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        6 个月前

        Well, you’re certainly not a logician

    • wolfpack86@lemmy.world
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      6 个月前

      But like why did they fill up all plump and not just be like a deflated balloon.

      • tooclose104@lemmy.ca
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        6 个月前

        Farts blow open the empty kernels like a plastic bag in the wind, then the poop gets in them

        • wolfpack86@lemmy.world
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          6 个月前

          Finally someone with a science based explanation

      • nickwitha_k (he/him)@lemmy.sdf.org
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        6 个月前

        Likely because of the pressure that experienced when the feces mines through the colon.

        • wolfpack86@lemmy.world
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          6 个月前

          Sorry buddy but swim underwater with a deflated balloon and you get a deflated balloon… Not a poopflated kernel.

          • nickwitha_k (he/him)@lemmy.sdf.org
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            6 个月前

            Balloons are elastic. This would be more like a plastic bag. Plus, there’s more than water in poop, or there should be unless you’re having a really bad time.

    • Zement@feddit.nl
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      6 个月前

      “Scoop some poop,… for science!”

  • unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de
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    6 个月前

    Most people dont chew more than 2-3 times so its kinda expected that stuff goes down unchewed

    • MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de
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      I compulsively chew at least 11 times in a vain attempt to diminish my obesity. My lack of a sizable beer gut(versus most of my peers) shows promise, nevermind that I basically don’t drink, but I assure you, the corn does not care.

    • Sombyr@lemmy.zip
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      Disclaimer, I have dysphagia, so this isn’t meant to be the average person’s experience, but… I was eating when I read this and counted how many times I chewed when I took a bite until I felt comfortable swallowing and it was 47. You’re telling me normal people can chew as low as 2 times? Astounding.

      • vithigar@lemmy.ca
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        I’m in the zero to ten camp for most foods, but right there with you at 47 for fatty meat of any kind. It feels disgusting in my mouth and to swallow it without gagging I need to basically cut it up with my incisors into smaller and smaller pieces until the texture disappears.

      • unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de
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        6 个月前

        I mean it depends on what you eat ofcourse. Its just a linear change between soup(0) and crackers(idk maybe 10).

        Like a mouthful Spaghetti doesnt need too much like maybe 4-5 times for me, but i have seen plenty of people who almost swallow pasta unchewed. Something like meat or carrots or whatever needs some more to get it to a small enough size to swallow and it just keeps going up with size, hardness and dryness.

      • toynbee@lemmy.world
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        6 个月前

        There’s a Calvin & Hobbes strip that would apply perfectly here, but I can’t find it. It features them discussing how many times it’s appropriate to chew food and the punch line is “maybe marshmallows are the exception.” Unfortunately, I couldn’t find that, so here’s the closest I could:

      • Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de
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        6 个月前

        i think i generally chew maybe… 6-10 times? but depending on the food i can either chew a lot more or a lot less, soft foods like well-boiled spaghetti just don’t really make sense to our brains and so we don’t chew properly.

      • DeaDvey@lemmy.ml
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        6 个月前

        Is this bad? Maybe I have it because I’m similar.

        • Sombyr@lemmy.zip
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          Fortunately, I think you’d probably notice if you did. Makes it hella hard to swallow stuff unless you pulverize it to a paste. In my case, some days I can’t even swallow things as simple as applesauce and have to just drink high calorie liquids.

          Edit: After seeing the rest of your comments in this thread… Yeah, sounds like dysphagia. Dysphagia is a symptom though, not the condition itself. If you’ve got it, something deeper is wrong. In my case it’s likely nerve damage and allergies together.

    • DeaDvey@lemmy.ml
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      6 个月前

      Is this true? I chew for a few minutes before swallowing normally, find it difficult to swallow otherwise.

      • krashmo@lemmy.worldBanned from community
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        6 个月前

        A few minutes per bite?!?

        • Trashboat@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          6 个月前

          Bros gonna starve in the middle of eating

        • DeaDvey@lemmy.ml
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          I eat slow.

          • candybrie@lemmy.world
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            I don’t even know how you keep the food in your mouth chewing that long. After a minute most of it has managed to make it’s way to my throat without any effort by me to get it there.

            • DeaDvey@lemmy.ml
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              6 个月前

              Yeah, I never really actively swallow, it’s too painful, I just wait for the food to slide down.

              • medgremlin@midwest.social
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                You should ask about getting a swallowing study done to find out what’s going on because that isn’t normal. It might be an esophageal stricture or spasm that can be fixed.

                • DeaDvey@lemmy.ml
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                  6 个月前

                  It’s probably just that I have a small mouth and throat.

              • Enkrod@feddit.org
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                6 个月前

                That sounds concerning… are you alright?

                • DeaDvey@lemmy.ml
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                  6 个月前

                  I think so.

          • unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de
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            6 个月前

            Its said to be healthy and improve digestion to chew more and eat slowly so there isnt really any reason to stop.

      • sunbather@beehaw.org
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        6 个月前

        afaik its more based on time than number of chews, food generally spends about 10-20 seconds in your mouth if you aren’t in a rush but it depends on the food and individual

  • Kyrgizion@lemmy.world
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    6 个月前

    “Corn? When did I eats corn?”

    • spankinspinach@sh.itjust.works
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      This is the most alarming experience. Especially in the middle of winter when fewer things have corn readily included

  • JaggedRobotPubes@lemmy.world
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    At least find an uncensored version. Jesus. So dumb.

    • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netBanned from communityOP
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      • frayedpickles@lemmy.cafe
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        Seems like an extreme reaction to a reasonable request

        • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netBanned from communityOP
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          I have a flair for the dramatic

          • frayedpickles@lemmy.cafe
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            6 个月前

            Magikarp used splash

        • Excrubulent@slrpnk.net
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          6 个月前

          “Jesus. So dumb.”

      • bitjunkie@lemmy.world
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        6 个月前

        What were these books called?

        • toynbee@lemmy.world
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          6 个月前

          This one appears to be called “I Guess I’ll Just Go Fuck Myself: Thanks for Nothing, Dickbag McShitstain.” Hope this helps!

        • 1985MustangCobra@lemmy.ca
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          6 个月前

          little critter. i had a video game of one of the books i used to play the shit out of as a kid.

          • FurtiveFugitive@lemm.ee
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            Just Grandma and Me where they go to the beach? I had that one and now my kid plays the shit out of it too.

            • 1985MustangCobra@lemmy.ca
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              6 个月前

              shit thats fresh

        • EndHD@lemm.ee
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          6 个月前

          “Just Go to Bed” by Mercer Mayer

    • Norah (pup/it/she)@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      https://sh.itjust.works/post/29385078

  • rumba@lemmy.zip
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    Cornshells are tough AF and we’re shit at chewing.

  • NABDad@lemmy.world
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    If you really want to discover something crazy, swallow some raisins whole.

    • TheFriar@lemm.ee
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      Do they come out as grapes

      • gibmiser@lemmy.world
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        6 个月前

        God I hope they re-hydrate and come out plump and poo water filled

        • LostXOR@fedia.io
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          6 个月前

          Pop 'em right back in your mouth for a juicy treat!

    • sangriaferret@sh.itjust.works
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      I don’t particularly care for raisins but I might have to go get some to satisfy my curiosity.

  • Agent641@lemmy.world
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    6 个月前

    The T-1000 variant

  • AbsoluteChicagoDog@lemm.ee
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    deleted by creator

    • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netBanned from communityOP
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      • hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netBanned from communityOP
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          6 个月前

          That’s more like it

        • 1985MustangCobra@lemmy.ca
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          6 个月前

      • GiantChickDicks@lemmy.ml
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        You have great reaction memes, and I’m shamelessly harvesting them.

      • Korne127@lemmy.world
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        6 个月前

        Talking about yourself?

    • TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world
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      This censorship is so weak that I honestly think it’s parody at this point.

      • 1985MustangCobra@lemmy.ca
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        That’s the point.

    • Norah (pup/it/she)@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      https://sh.itjust.works/post/29385078

      Edit: Also just so you know, your downvotes on 196 are just a shout into the void, considering blahaj has them disabled <3

      • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netBanned from communityOP
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        6 个月前

        your boos mean nothing! I’ve see what makes you cheer

      • Vespair@lemm.ee
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        deleted by creator

    • CrayonMaster@midwest.social
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      It has like 2 pixels of white on the u, I had to scroll back up to know what you were talking about.

    • 1985MustangCobra@lemmy.ca
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      You do understand this is done on purpose for reactions like yours?

  • flicker@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    I’m allergic to corn, so I don’t know if this is true, but if I pooped a food that was still whole I’d consider not eating it again.

    • Duranie
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      The outside of the kernel is very fibrous, so when chewing it’s less about breaking down the outside and more like popping the insides out of its skin. We need all kinds of fiber in our diets, so the outside of the corn kernels passing through is just fine.

    • robocall@lemmy.world
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      6 个月前

      What happens if you eat corn? Can you eat tortilla chips?

      • FoxyFerengi@lemm.ee
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        6 个月前

        Not who you asked, but I’m allergic to corn. Tortilla chips, cornbread, anything made with corn starch, cornmeal (including pizza because people use that on the bottom of pizza), some gluten free and some vegan foods have triggered allergic reactions for me.

        It’s extra fun trying to find food I can eat that I haven’t made myself, because I’m also allergic to wheat and eggs.

        • NotSteve_@lemmy.ca
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          You actually make me feel better about my recent celiac diagnosis. I’m sorry you’ve got to deal with all that though, that sounds terrible.

          Are you allergic to wheat or are you also celiac?

          • FoxyFerengi@lemm.ee
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            Celiac is so difficult! I’m sorry you have to deal with that. You’ll get into a routine eventually, especially when it comes to checking food labels. You’ll still have to deal with trusting people when it comes to eating at restaurants or friends. I ordered food last week for the first time in ages and asked if their soup has corn. I forgot to add “or corn starch”, totally gave myself a terrible allergic reaction lol

            As far as I can tell, gluten does not trigger my allergies. I don’t know which protein I’m allergic to, the allergist couldn’t tell me

        • Madison420@lemmy.world
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          The fig app is kinda helpful of you haven’t tried it.

  • irelephant [he/him]🍭@lemm.ee
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    you’re supposed to chew 30 times, but who has time for that

  • 🍪CRUMBGRABBER🍪@lemm.ee
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    You need my one neat trick.

  • ForeverComical@lemmy.ca
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    They say that’s how the inventor of the machine gun had his eureka!

    • GCanuck@lemmy.world
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      Expound please.

  • kingthrillgore@lemmy.ml
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    • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.netBanned from communityOP
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      I need more context.

      • kingthrillgore@lemmy.ml
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        I would give you more context but I think its funnier if I leave it without.

  • Comrade Spood@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    deleted by creator

  • 1985MustangCobra@lemmy.ca
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    6 个月前

    It hurts when i shit corn but it won’t stop me from eating it. real good shit.

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