In Australia we believe in equality, so I’ll piss off all the states.
Victoria : “afDanistan”, wokeville. Small latte drinkers who don’t have a driver’s licence. Labourers and Stop/Go people on $200,000.
New South Wales: dumb boomers on $3m property. Driving at 80kmh on their Learner drivers plates. Shit at rugby. Sydney nightlife ends at 9pm.
South Australia: “oh yeah I have an auntie there I think.” Nothing to do. Their water tastes funny. Churches everywhere. Weird 1.5hr timezone.
Western Australia: If you want to know why there’s a wait time for Toyota’s, it’s bloody WA buying them all. Full of cashed up bogans in lifted land cruisers. Have to watch footy at lunch time because they are 3 timezones away. If you are anti social and don’t mind a 6hr drive to anywhere live there.
Tasmania: 10 people live there with a mild sense of imbreeding. Looks kinda nice, but why would you go to Tassy if you can go to New Zealand for the same price.
Northern Territory: biggest employers, the mines and Pine Gap (the CIA base). Otherwise it’s Australia’s poverty lane.
Australian Capital Territory: Australia’s Uni campus. A concrete jungle, a tiny town where we keep the big wigs who are driven everywhere in black BMWs or Camry’s.
In Australia we believe in equality, so I’ll piss off all the states.
Victoria : “afDanistan”, wokeville. Small latte drinkers who don’t have a driver’s licence. Labourers and Stop/Go people on $200,000.
New South Wales: dumb boomers on $3m property. Driving at 80kmh on their Learner drivers plates. Shit at rugby. Sydney nightlife ends at 9pm.
South Australia: “oh yeah I have an auntie there I think.” Nothing to do. Their water tastes funny. Churches everywhere. Weird 1.5hr timezone.
Western Australia: If you want to know why there’s a wait time for Toyota’s, it’s bloody WA buying them all. Full of cashed up bogans in lifted land cruisers. Have to watch footy at lunch time because they are 3 timezones away. If you are anti social and don’t mind a 6hr drive to anywhere live there.
Tasmania: 10 people live there with a mild sense of imbreeding. Looks kinda nice, but why would you go to Tassy if you can go to New Zealand for the same price.
Northern Territory: biggest employers, the mines and Pine Gap (the CIA base). Otherwise it’s Australia’s poverty lane.
Australian Capital Territory: Australia’s Uni campus. A concrete jungle, a tiny town where we keep the big wigs who are driven everywhere in black BMWs or Camry’s.
Looks like I’m bound for West Australia, boys
The bush capital being referred to as a concrete jungle is so out of touch it’s almost poetic.