A follow up from my older asklemmy post, saying goodbye to a teacher who helped me a lot through my stuff, was thinking maybe chocolate, but one of the dudes said that it’s not a very good idea, I was thinking maybe a perfume/cologne? What do you guys suggest? She is in probably in her early 20s if it helps, and I am in senior high, damn this is getting weirder and weirder, I just want to run away lol
A greeting card with a note about how she helped you.
Material gifts will get used up and thrown out over time. But she’ll collect notes and letters from her students over the years, and they will help remind her why she’s teaching.
This, and if you really really wanna put a monetary gift in there, get them a gift card for coffee(go local fuck Starbucks) or honestly somewhere like target that sells school supplies. It’s a bit orphan crushing machine but they may really appreciate the extra cash for supplies.
A gift card for school supplies is a great idea
Concur. I have every card, note, poster, or coloring page I’ve ever gotten from a student. (I volunteered with kids younger than OP)
Misspelled words don’t matter (I guess maybe if it’s your language arts/spelling/writing teacher it would matter a little) because they thought of me and put time, thought, and energy into a gift for me instead of making a tiktok or whatever.
I got fired from my job, and while I was cleaning out my locker I found a folder in the back of my locker.
It had a note from an old lady I helped once. She wrote a whole note about how nice it was to work with me.
The other thing was a hand-drawn card from a coworker’s daughter, proclaiming me as her friend forever.
I also had a big stack of gift cards the company had given me to show their appreciation, and I just took them so I’d have food. I don’t feel the slightest bit of meaning from those gift cards.
Honestly an email from my boss saying “Hey good job on X” would have gone so much further than those gift cards.
This. I’m a teacher, and I have about a thousand gift mugs stuck in a closet, but I will hang on to that raggedy half torn post it note that says, “Thank you Mr. [Name] for helping me :)” literally until the day I die.
In my desk, I have a special folder full of notes from students that I look at when I have a bad day.
We don’t do it for the money, we do it to help you have a better life. So when students tell us we helped, the feeling is incredible.
If you want to make sure it doesn’t get mistaken for romantic feelings, just think, “Would I feel weird saying this to my Aunt/Uncle?” while writing it.
Some potential sentence starters:
What I appreciated most about being in your class was…
One time you really helped me was when…
Something you really helped me understand was…
The one thing you should never stop doing in class is…
Whatever you write, your teacher will love it :)
As a teacher, just a letter or card saying how they impacted you is enough.
Fellow teacher here, I concur. I’ve never gotten a physical gift from a student, and I don’t think I’d be comfortable with it.
A card would be weird too, but better by several powers of magnitude than an actual gift. And perfume? WTF my dude?
“There’s no way perfume could be construed as romantic!”
Not a teacher (but I work with people that sometimes want to give me gifts when we say goodbye) and I agree, card or a letter is great!
Either that or something I can share with my colleagues (chocolate, assorted sweets).
A heartfelt, handwritten thank-you letter telling them they’re a great teacher and how they positively impacted your life.
And an apple 🍎
This. My sister in law teaches and keeps all the letters she gets from her students. It’s stuff like that that keeps teachers going.
I don’t think you have to worry too much. A classic gift of a vibrator should probably get your point across and not get misinterpreted.
(Sorry, I had to, I know I’m dumb)
A fountain pen or a nice moleskin notebook with a note saying how her lessons will help you in your future life.
I think a perfume is too personal and might come out as a romantic gesture (and difficult to choose if you don’t know what she likes anyway).
A nice fountain pen seems like a good idea, Thanks!
As a fountain pen user, I would suggest against that unless you know it suits her personality. Fountains pens require maintenance, and certainly it’s easy maintenance, but it’s definitely more work than a ballpoint. They are a hobby, and if it’s is not her thing, she’ll never use it.
I would instead recommend a nice ballpoint pen set where the ink can be replaced when empty. Something she can use without having to think about or maintaining it.
Tbh I am kinda thinking of somehow giving some muffins, maybe go to school early, like ppl said, teachers have a lot of clutter so pen might not be the best choice
Speaking as a teacher here: do not buy any teacher anything, as in NOTHING.
I would be super weirded out if a student gave me something.
We had a student of more years than most, present the teacher’s lounge with a chocolate basket once, and everyone thought it was strange. So presenting a teacher with a personal gift would be even stranger.
But if you insist on getting her a gift, perfume would be up there with lingerie and jewelry … WTF dude?
what should you do? how about you decide what it is that you want to say. Like “you did so and so, that meant a lot for me because of so and so”.
- Figure out what to say
- make sure you don’t spend more than 30 or 45 seconds to say it.
Idk but judging from the username, maybe this kind of culture is there in nordic countries? Idk but here students give gifts all the time on teachers day, I just don’t know what is in those boxes lol, as I never attend these kind of events, and idk if ppl give them outside of these events
One thing I haven’t seen yet: if you can, loop your parent(s) in on this. They know the situation better than the Internet does, and if someone tries to turn the situation into something weird, they should have your back. And they’ve got some life experience to help you with your note.
Damn, that’s good advice.
However the sarcastic side of me is looking forward to the next post in a months time when they ignored this, etc…
“How do I propose to my old teacher?” And so on
I hope to god this never happens but that would be hilarious ngl
Lmao at the perfume and chocolates. You somehow beelined to the most Valentines related gifts possible.
The suggestion for a letter or card saying how much they helped you is the best idea. If you don’t feel up to writing, then think about a professional gift, like a fancy pen or something to sit on their desk. Don’t spend a lot of money, that makes it weird. Less than $30.
I’m so glad we had this talk at this stage of your life before you gave your first boss a fine bottle of perfume and then had a bewildering conversation with HR, lol.
Unless you’re living in a horny anime I don’t think you have much to worry about with what they think. However, don’t give your teacher perfume—that’s insane and inappropriate for anyone outside of a romantic partner / close friend.
Write them a thank-you note and get them a Starbucks gift card.
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As a teacher, I treasure all of the heart-felt notes and letters students have left me over the years. If you want to give something that shows them how important they are to you, write them a letter.
SOURCE!
Edit: I guess I should clarify. I’m saying that this is the ultimate source as an answer to this question. I’m not ordering this person to cite a source. Sorry for the interruption.
A thank you card and a gift certificate for food. Everybody needs food.
“Good for one food”
As another poster suggested: muffins and a nice card go a long way. Especially since few students show appreciation anyway. She’ll definitely appreciate the card and gesture more than any particular gift that you might include.
And definitely don’t do perfume. It’s difficult enough to shop for yourself, much less for others. Just don’t.
I just love any scent as long as it’s not too strong ¯_(ツ)_/¯, but I know people can be very picky, but honestly as long as I don’t smell sweat, I am happy
Fragrance is a very risky gift. Some people do not want that shit and don’t even want it around them. I get upset if I’m sharing a room with someone wearing too much perfume for too long.
My coworker is very sensitive to fragrances. I personally love a nice cologne, but I can’t wear the strong stuff around her without it bothering her. So I don’t.
a pineapple. Can never be seen as romantic.
Never say never. I’d go on a date for pineapple
Unless you are into swinging. Then it’s very inappropriate
Gift certificate. That’s something that can NEVER be mistaken for romance.
a genuine card and a gift card to a nice restaurant. or maybe a wine voucher
Maybe find another student and gift something together.
I live in a trashy society and my friends are a gr8 example, if they even catch a snitch, next day is gonna be like ‘Oooooh he loves his teacher ooooooh’
Protip since you’re young, it’s all fine and good if your friends bust your balls as a joke, but if you genuinely don’t think you can do a nice gesture for a teacher without them incessantly mocking you, you need better friends.
Like if you give a gift to this teacher, and your friends start cracking wise about it, do you think they’ll stop on their own or give you shit about it for the rest of time?
Don’t be embarrassed about wanting to do something nice for someone. If your friends are immature about it, that’s their problem.
“I live in a trashy society” don’t we all brother
More seriously, you got great advices in the thread, esp the pen and the muffins. You can offer sweets without having it mistaken as a romantic gestures, it then depends on the sweets you offer. A box of chocolates intent can easily be misconstrued, a box of donuts/muffins, much less so. Except if said muffins have hearts on them, it’s all about context.
Good luck !
