And it sticks. I mean, focus your attention in that little world of meanings and symbols long enough and you’ll tend to get stuck there.
But reality is infinitely larger than that little world. So to stay there, in that little world, to have your perspective altered like that all the time, is a bit unhealthy and insane.
But this is considered normal. Encouraged even.
Okay but your last meal also changed your internal chemistry and probably changed your outlook too. It’s insane to believe you can remain unchanged by everything in life.
It’s ironic that I have an anecdote that I recently read that feels very fitting here.
Permutation City by Greg Egan. Post-human digital consciousness via uploaded brain-scan becomes possible, and there are interesting questions about how the “sense of self” is derived, and how much someone can change themselves before they are no longer the same person. There are many different characters that deal with a newfound immortality in different ways, and either embrace, or shun, the ability to change themselves at a whim to fit their needs or wants. It’s a very prominent part of the overall plot and is prevalent right up until the last sentence.
Also, separate from that, I have the exact opposite feeling as OP. When I’m reading a book, I feel like my world is expanded in new directions. I tend to see certain things from slightly different perspectives in the context of what I’m reading. I’ve been reading Greg Egan’s entire body of work (after reading Diaspora and absolutely fucking loving it), and some insight and thoughts I had about the book Quarantine actually pushed me to make positive changes in my life that have been really hugely impactful, and I don’t think I would have had the courage or drive to make them had I not been thinking about my life in such an abstract manner.
Permutation City blew my mind too. Such great ideas. Definitely in my top 10 faves.
Diaspora, and other Egan too, ya. But PC most of all. I’ve read it like 6 times. It’s got that proper scifi vibe. The walls of reality crumble.
(Btw, what was the meaning of the testicular spasm? Was it a metaphor?)
I think it was just an odd way of making him seem more human and normal. Also the fact that he doesn’t mention anything about it also happening in his previous lives leaves an interesting open question that could either lend credence or hinder his whole backstory… At least that’s how I interpreted it.
All in all, though… one of the less awkward and more impactful sex scenes in a science-y book, which is much better than the usual ones I remember because they’re terrible and awkward and don’t fit in with the surrounding plot lol
Here’s a story that explores similar ground.
Divided by Infinity
It’s in The Perseids and Other Stories By Robert Charles Wilson
Maybe it was a mark of his alienness. A fundamental human pleasure rendered painful. He was on his hundredth universe after all.