The older I get the more clear basically every facet of our society is to exploit us and fill us with propaganda.
The first thing that comes to mind when I wake up is how much I just hate being surround by this species that seems to want nothing more than to destroy itself.
Everything is a fucking joke and I’m fucking tired of everyone but I have a daughter.
I’m absolutely miserable and disgusted by basically everyone but I don’t have the luxury of being able to quit. I just long for death.
I’m only alive because of my friend. She means everything to me and is the only one that fully believes me.
edit: forgot to mention, but yeah, she would be devastated if I killed myself, which is why I don’t.
I used to feel more suicidal. Nowadays I think if I was feeling like I truly wanted to do that, I would want to take an oligarch with me
We could use more of this feeling.
That’s a sad sentence. I feel sad typing it. I feel sad reflecting on the truth of it. I feel sad every second that I don’t see breaking news of Trump’s (and musk, and (insert every currently elected Republican name here) brutality-record-setting tortuous death.
I wish he could die more than once, just so different kind of pain could be inflicted on him each time.
So yeah, any of you out there that feel this way, please take a trump with you. Take an RFK with you. Take a Boebert with you. Something like that, take at least one.
That’s my current state as well: if I kill myself just like that, the ones in power won. So I’m not letting them win. Either by surviving or… your option.
I don’t think about suicide, but when my wife asks "aren’t you sad you will die one day? . I’m like “no, sad for the kids, but I will be dead, I won’t know and I won’t have to work in the morning–So that Seems fine.”
I hate things like North America is supporting Israel and so many kids are dying because Premiers and Presidents aren’t stepping in. It makes me weary, but I try to do small things to make other peoples lives better.
Sometimes that has been making homemade bread and soup to hand out to homeless peopl. Sometimes its seeing a craigslist ad of somebody getting rid of something they think is broken, and I’ll respond with instructions on how it can be saved. The happy replies when you just saved somebody a $350+ repair bill (or cost of rebuying something) are worth it.
*raises hand
I’m glad you’re still here.
Thank you.
Just like eating only junk food is bad for your body, so is current news bad for the mind. I suggest you seek out actually positive news channels on YouTube or smth. We live in a very shitty world but there is still so much good in it. There is free open source software out there, there is volunteer work, there are people who give time, money, energy to worthy causes, with nothing to gain. And that’s worth fighting for (Mr Frodo)!
Positive news? What like the “all of these employees gave up sick time to coworker” kinds of stories where you need to not ask the obvious questions to feel good about?
I’ve never experienced anything positive that was news worthy that I’m aware of.
Its not just news, its the little things. Local things. Kids hitting new milestones in learning. Beauty in nature, and in the hands of artists all around us. Different wondrous things being researched that are going to help the human race in the future. There is so much wonder and excitement in this life just waiting to be experienced, but most of these things are not easily monetized when reported.
Been there. Reason I didnt is because other people would bear the shit if I did. Im in a much better place at the moment but I felt exactly the way ypu do about the world.
There is a fuckload of propaganda, and a lot of it is meant to make you lose hope at ever seeing the system change. That makes the opinion that things can and might improve and you are going to be a part of it, no matter how small the most radical thing of all.
Genuinely what helped me through it was volunteering. Everything is shit wall to wall BUT this one tiny thing is better than it was because of me. Its a sustaining feeling for sure.
Keep hanging in there for the ones you love, and the ones that love you.
I’m glad you’re still here.
I would be lying if I said my cats haven’t been the primary reason I haven’t seriously considered suicide. Maybe taking care of some living thing (even a plant) can give you a reason for life. This question hits close to home for me, and feel free to DM if you want to talk.
Understandable and feels for all of that. Only reason I’m still alive is not because I fear death but I’m afraid of surviving it and living a even worse life by force. The Amerikkkan medical system is extremely hard on people who attempt it and don’t really care if you lost a arm or something, they will still treat you just as shit and probably worse. So yeah, it’s not about being afraid I might hurt others because I’m gone. I’m afraid I might hurt others because I survived it and they have to take more care of me because of it.
This. Its sorta hard to die in some ways in the modern world without taking a big risk of severely disabled survival.
Whatever the reason is, I’m glad you’re still here.
theoretically if my death would upset no one I’d be out tomorrow. I’m over the loneliness
Gratitude is a revolutionary act in times like these. Since you’re going to die, anyway, you might as well enjoy the ride as much as you can and teach your child to do the same. If you manage to make the world a better place along the way, then so much the better.
Peace.
I get it, but I want you to recognize that thinking there isn’t a way to improve things can be seen as propaganda. I understand that the situation can feel bleak and hopeless, but what I try to do is look for small changes. While we cannot make all necessary changes quickly, we can make a small difference, even if it’s just a little. If things are too difficult, there’s no shame in surviving as long as possible. Sometimes, all we can do is buy ourselves some extra time.
I actually seriously considered that thought for the first time the other day. Turns out hurting my family is a pretty good motivator to not off myself. It’s a double edged sword though because I also don’t do other things I want because I don’t want to hurt them or face their condemnation.
I’m glad you’re still here.
Thank you friend.
I felt that way for a while, then I found out those people didn’t care about me as much as I thought. I’ve been holding on to my anger at that to keep me going for a year now. I dunno what’ll happen once that burns out.
The secret is to not be close to anyone. In some ways it’s liberating.
