• 3 Posts
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Joined 10 months ago
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Cake day: December 2nd, 2023

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  • I would like to share a story here of the first time I went backpacking.

    I rented my equipment from my university’s gym. I had checked the weather, and the low temperature for the weekend was supposed to be about 45F. For sleeping bags I had 2 options, one rated for 32F and 15F. After talking with the student employee behind the counter, we agreed that I didn’t need the 15F. I also decided not take a sleeping pad, because I slept outside on the bare ground quite a few times and felt it was unnecessary. I didn’t think k about insulation at all.

    That weekend there was an “unexpected cold snap” and the night time temps dropped into the low 20s. I set up camp right next to a river, and I didn’t stake my rainfly out properly.

    Holy shit I thought I was going to die. I took every bit of fabric I had and stuffed it into my sleeping bag, but it still wasn’t enough. All night, condensation collected on the fly and dripped onto my face. It was like Chinese water torture on top of hypothermia. I also failed to build a fire and I couldn’t cook dinner (no firestarters, no gas, and it had rained for a week before I got there).

    I was hungry, freezing, and wet. That was the most miserable night of my life. I had to bail. At 5am I left and went to the closest McDonald’s and got some shitty coffee and it was amazing in contrast lol

    10 years later and I still overpack clothes because I have a fear that the temp might to drop 20 degrees unexpectedly.

    So to anybody reading this and wondering about what bag to get. Go lower than you think you need (you can always sleep on top of it). Use a sleeping pad with good insulation (you can choose not to use it if its too hot). Don’t set up camp right next to a body of water if you’re not ready to deal with extra humidity. And learn how to properly use all your equipment before you set out. A properly staked out rainfly can make the difference between a good night’s sleep and extreme psychological torture.

    I swear I can still feel the drip drip drip on my face from that night haha









  • It’s interesting that you say the bit about being selfish and idealization. It’s been really hard to imagine this as selfishness. But that is because in my conception of this person is so much selflessness. She never gave me a reason to think otherwise. But clearly this is an idealization.

    Your 3rd perspective would be my preference, had we talked like adults and she didnt just go scorched earth on the relationship. I need to ackowledge that selfishness and the fact that it has nothing to do with me.

    It does feel like she died. And I actually just heard about this phenomenon where people who are unable to attend the funerals of loved ones have a hard time believing that they’re gone. Looking at the corpse gives you closure. So I think I may talk with her just to get that closure, but I need to aknowledge that I’m looking at the corpse of what we had. Thanks