Although the idea of Kirk (SHATner, lol) sitting in his captain’s seat on the bridge grunting with exertion mid-battle command as the Klingon war birds decloak, loading his pants, and requesting an “evac” of his pants from Scotty only to find out the transporters are down is… chefs kiss.

Couldn’t he just lift the seat in his chair and poop in the toilet that’s probably under it?

I mean look how big and thick it is. There’s gotta be plumbing under there.