Dating is odd to me. I do not really know what my motivations are. If I actually find someone. What then? What will we do? How different will our relationship be from a regular friendship (besides you know what). And should it be?

Should you be wanting to do other things with your SO then a very good friend?

What I’m getting at is, have you ever thought to someone: “They don’t really want a relationship they just want a one particular friend with benefits.”

I don’t know if I’m rambling over here. But I’m really having difficulty digesting this one.

Edit: The reason I ask is because I’m thinking to start dating again but I don’t know my end goal.

  • Professorozone@lemmy.world
    91·
    10 months ago

    Opinions vary, but it’s my opinion out of all the things two people need to be compatible, friendship is by far the most important. At best sex only lasts, what eight to ten hours, the rest of the time you need a friend. When you are younger, you may be doing it all over the house but when you’re older things typically slow down or there may be times when someone is injured, tired, stuck at work, whatever. In those times understanding, compassion, commiseration and cooperation are important. If your partner is your best friend, you’re never lonely and you can share things. It’s so much harder when you have very little in common with your partner.

    Guess I’m rambling now, but this is how I see it.

    Good luck to you.

      • Professorozone@lemmy.world
        22·
        10 months ago

        OK, perhaps I was exaggerating a bit. Perhaps it’s more like 10 to 12, but the point still remains that you have to occupy the rest of that time and it’s best if you have a good friend to do that with.

      • Nollij@sopuli.xyzEnglish
        12·
        10 months ago

        He said “At best”.

        It’s not so unreasonable if you have an open interpretation of what counts as sex. Certainly PiV penetration won’t last that long by itself. But if you count foreplay, the afterglow, and subsequent sessions all as one, it becomes reasonable, especially in your 20s.

        • thorbot@lemmy.world
          51·
          10 months ago

          What the fuck is with this thread and all the insane people saying with seriousness that sex last 8 hours… I can’t handle it