I can barely remember everything that’s blown my mind. Seeing everything that I’ve felt, that’s made me feel so isolated from other people because I can’t explain it, or they just don’t understand is crazy. Especially Echolalia. I literally can’t go for a few seconds without quoting something. Especially Red Dead Redemption 2. Saying “sure” has never been the same after playing that game lol. Reading through this has blown my mind. It’s like reading out my thoughts. Thanks for the support.

  • Dae@pawb.social
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    1 year ago

    The hardest part about figuring out you’re autistic is just the fact that so many of the symptoms are things that are perfectly normal, but you experience it to either an abnormally high or low degree. And you really only have your own experiences to go off of, so when you find out that one of your experiences is a symptom of autism, it’s like “wait, you mean to tell me that’s not normal?”

    And that first discovery starts down the rabbit hole and before you know it, your entire life is flipped upside down and you spend months re-evaluation your entire life and putting the pieces together.

      • Dae@pawb.social
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        1 year ago

        I feel that man! It takes a long time to get through it. If you’re able, therapy is a huge help with it, but otherwise it will sort itself out. Just take your time to process it all and learn to accept yourself! Sharing with those closest to you and getting their acceptance is also an amazing and helpful experience!

        • cogitoprinciple@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          I already see a therapist, but he does not specialise in Autism, nor does he know a lot about it. So I’m considering seeing someone who does, so that I can get help that is more relevant to my needs. I’ve shared it with just a few people, and they have been okay with it, so that has been good. But I don’t think they really get what it means for me. So I think I will be educating them on what that means for me, as I gradually learn more, and understand myself better.

          • Dae@pawb.social
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            1 year ago

            My own therapist recommended a book that was already very helpful less than a chapter in called “Unmasking Autism.” It may help you with learning more about what it means to be autistic.

                • SimonFabianMueller@mastodon.social
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                  1 year ago

                  @cogitoprinciple Many autistic people struggle with that. All your live everyone around you signals your feelings or opinions are wrong and you have to adopt NT-feelings. Everyone: „Birthday parties are great! Gotta love it!“ Me: „Mh, no, actually they suck and are exhausting as fuck“. Everyone: „No, what‘s wrong with you!!!“. Everyone wants to be normal, so you learn to hide your true self quickly. Not me anymore. I‘m settling for „autistically normal“ now🥳

            • cogitoprinciple@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              That’s insane. I still can’t fathom how hard it is to get diagnosed. It feels like resources are severely lacking for those of us who are autistic.

              • Mugmoor@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                1 year ago

                My Doctor’s are actively reaching out to their colleagues to see if anyone can get me in sooner, but yes. That’s Ontario for ya.

  • MostlyMute@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Not officially diagnosed but my dad and niece recently were. When I figured it out a few years ago, I pretty much shrugged it off and ignored it.

    I’m paying a bit more attention and slowly learning more now, mostly because my sister has been researching so much. Don’t really feel ready to do a deep dive into analysing everything about me that affected by autism, but I am learning more.

    My sister actually said to me that she didn’t realise how hard it must have been for me in school without out any support and pointed out specifically how an issue with my neck and wearing a tie is a sensory issue.

    Blew my mind as I’d never considered it, just thought I was being overly dramatic and weird with feeling like I was suffocating. I ended up crying so many times after being told off for not wearing it properly and having the top buttons of my shirt undone. Only thing I got in to trouble for at school.

    She’s also made me rethink some other issues I’ve had. Like my gullibility. It’s hard for me to know for certain if someone is messing around or lying and I usually take things more literally than I should. I’m better now than I was as a kid, but still see it if I think back on some conversations. And my penchant for answering personal questions honestly even when the questions were inappropriate and shouldn’t have been asked.

    Big one I’ve been considering lately is just how much of my replies at work a basically a script. Most customer conversations repeat in the same basic way, and I repeat the same responses to them all. May be why I get annoyed with overly friendly regular customers. They’re more random in what they say, tell me more personal things and I don’t know how to respond.

  • clara@feddit.uk
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    1 year ago

    welcome to the club ❤️

    here’s a welcome gift: consider that every bit of advice that you have ever been given in your life, has been given to you in the belief that you are ““normal”” (read: NT, like them), and because most of that advice is not tuned for your autistic brain, most of it is complete trash 😀👍

    consider this example: has anyone ever told you to “just read their body language”?

    • Sketchpad01@lemmy.worldOP
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      I’ve definitely started doubting and questing things that I think and feel. I recently quit a job I had been working at for about 4 years, not because of autism just moving on. And on the last day I kept thinking “this is the last time I get to do X”. Then I realized that I don’t care, like at all about it being my last time, this whole time I’ve been doing this because I see other people do it. It’s so weird to go through this process and realize that almost my entire life has been a facade, it’s a good weird, it’s an answer to why I’ve felt this way, but weird nonetheless.

  • Ivy Raven@midwest.social
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    This is how I’ve been feeling the last few months. As I’ve started peeling more of my masks off and reading about others experiences and symptoms, yeah. I’m self diagnosed for now since I can’t see a therapist (no money or insurance) and free resources (city/county mental health) have been useless or at worse a hindrance.

  • mrvictory1@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    If I have almost all symptoms of Autism or ADHD but don’t get diagonised, what will I miss out?

    • Nyan@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      Self-diagnosing is not as reliable as a specialist giving that diagnosis as you might go into the assumption of these symptoms expecting a certain result, creating a biased judgement on yourself

      If your question is more about the point of knowing if you are on the spectrum or not, diagnosing these symptoms will also help understanding why it is happening and how to deal with them

      Not related to autism, but my gf is dyslexic. Did not get it diagnosed early enough, so she assumed she was simply not as smart as the other kids because it took her 3x longer to simply read something. That can cause some chilhood trauma and deep anxieties, but now knowing about what it is, it can help her let go of some bad memories around that and adjust some regular workflows with something that is easier for her, i.e. audiobooks, dyslexic fonts

    • BOMBS@lemmy.worldM
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      1 year ago

      professional help. you could get therapy and psychiatric support. in my experience, it will not change your personality, just make your life better ❤️

  • BOMBS@lemmy.worldM
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    1 year ago

    Echolalia.Echolalia.Echolalia.Echolalia.Echolalia.

    But seriously, I remember going through that. It was 3~4 months of my mind being blown on a daily basis. So many things were starting to make sense. It’s wild. Like another user comments, welcome to the club! You’ve found your people ❤️

  • readthemessage@lemmy.eco.br
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    I had the same feeling reading the comments in a reddit post that reached All, the happiness of finally being part of a group without making a huge effort is amazing

    • Sketchpad01@lemmy.worldOP
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      Being apart of a group feels great, going from feeling like none understands what I’m going through, to finding out not only is there a name for everything I do, but there’s people with similar experiences??? They’re like me??? I’m not alone???

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    Mr. Morgan.

    (Whose voice did you instinctively read that in? I’ve been on rdr2 for the past month or so. On my second campaign play through and it’s hands down the best campaign I’ve ever played.

    • Sketchpad01@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      Agent Milton’s voice, specifically when he walks into their camp and dutch calls him agent moron.

  • Tassereine@lemm.ee
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    Thanks for sharing this. Even after a year I’m still doing research for my self diagnosis and hasn’t run across this. Looking forward to reading it!

    • Sketchpad01@lemmy.worldOP
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      Check the info tab for this sublemmy (I guess that’s what you’d call it) it has a ton of information and stuff to read and watch, that’s actually where I found this!

  • Mugmoor@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    1 year ago

    This was my experience when my son was diagnosed. Going through all the questionnaires, interviews, etc was incredibly eye-opening for me.

    I recommend getting on a waiting list asap. Where I am it’s a 3-year wait to see someone who can give you a formal diagnosis.

    • Sketchpad01@lemmy.worldOP
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      Yeah I’m not lucky to live in a country where healthcare is free, I’ll be able to get a diagnosis in less than three years, but it won’t be soon because it’s expensive.

    • Sketchpad01@lemmy.worldOP
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      I actually quite like it, maybe it’s just because it’s like reading my thoughts and actions written out on a page and given names though.

    • avalokitesha@discuss.tchncs.de
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      Dude, have you any idea how many doctors told me (professionally diagnosed) that I can’t be autistic, sure, this is a bit weird, but it’s probably just X, that weird thing is probably just Y and so on, telling me I have like ten other things when all these ten things are all explained by autism?

      All because drumroll I can hold eye contact. Yes, I’ve been pressured into masking hard. It makes me suffer, and now you use it to deny me support?

      Most doctors have not kept up with the development on diagnosing atypical autism and the ones that do you have almost no chance of scoring an appointment with.

      And I am in a coultry where we at least do consider autism for females. There’s still lots of countries where high-functioning autists don’t get diagnosed.

      Let people “self-diagnose” if it means they findcoping mechanisms and things that explain thwir behaviors. Allow them to say “fuck you” when someone tells them they’re not trying hard enough because they are just lazy, when in reality they are so overwhelmed they can barely function.

      Don’t actively make people miserable, because they for whatever reason do not have a formal diagnosis. I encourage most peoble to get one, but I also heard of places that use an official diagnosis against them. I think I read someone from the UK claiming they had custody of their kids challenged because of a diagnosis.

      Let people find their coping mechanisms. Even if in the end they don’t have autism, how does this affect you or me or any other autistic person?

    • hecate@kbin.social
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      an autism diagnosis is a privilege. there are many communities who are overlooked when it comes to autism. women, people of colour and members of the LGBT+ community are all likely to be overlooked for a diagnosis because they don’t fit the stereotype. not to mention the financial factors of a diagnosis. self-diagnosis is widely accepted in the autistic community for these reasons.

    • Mugmoor@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      That’s incredibly easy to say, but also highly impractical.

      I’m waiting for a diagnosis, but the waiting list is just over 3 years. Self-Diagnosis is all most of us can hope for in the short-term. Many others will never even get that level of hope. I’m fortunate that health care is free where I live.

    • marionberrycore@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      1 year ago

      Being formally diagnosed can be a legal liability, such as when immigrating to many countries. On top of that, it can also cost thousands of dollars.