Drives me nuts when I have to skim like 6 paragraphs to actually get to the thing the headline described.

Nope, don’t care that the neighbor Janet heard a noise down the street but “couldn’t tell what was happening”. No, I do not care what about the mayor’s recent tree planting initiative. Why are you telling me that this was happening “only 3 blocks down from where the little league team, the Munchkins Brigade, were playing”? Is that relevant?

Just tell me what happened! Who did what to whom, how, and why?! Why should I care? Is that so fucking hard?! That’s all I’m here for. It’s literally your entire job. But no, they need people to scroll past 13 in-your-face ads crowding out the actual words of the articles before they leave the page. So now journalists and editors are literally trained to bury the lede under miles of foreplay bullshit. I hate the modern internet.