As in your never understood by anyone, you don’t fit in anywhere, nobody cares about you, you have no one in your life, no friends, no connections, nothing, all the common advice doesn’t work for you (i.e. distract yourself, take a walk, go to therapy, etc.), you have terrible luck, you can barely find a job, your broken inside, your mind is constantly rotting, you can’t do anything properly, your stuck in a shitty society and or an abusive household, etc. how do you survive? How do you properly bottle everything up without bursting or going insane in a situation like that?
Can I ask you from your own experiences if or where you found others who’re willing to bond with you exactly? From my personal experience I’ve had 0 luck with that, doesn’t matter what I do or change or try with or look in, irl especially, shitty society, shitty people, strict social norms, no social spaces, etc.
actual bonding comes later, first you have to spend a bunch of time just being in the presence of other people. make acquaintances using a common activity first is a good approach.
that you say “willing to” already kinda sounds like you don’t give others much opportunity to get to know you and vice versa. as another commenter said - you may be stuck in a self limiting loop.
make opportunities for connection first - find a litter clean up volunteer event, or a community garden where they need help, or an after school club, or a friendly working class bar (this was my place of choice for years until I found better alternatives)… the specific place or context doesn’t matter. find an activity or thing you enjoy (or could see yourself enjoying) and where other people can see/be around you… and eventually, completely unplanned you will invariably get to know people and then, maybe… bond with them. bonding isn’t a prerequisite to talking and sharing information about yourself or your struggles though. it can be as simple as pulling up a bar stool and raising a glass to someone you just met. or the non alcoholic equivalent if you don’t drink, I guess.
Your assuming and interpreting a lot there, guess I should’ve worded things differently, my bad. Also you don’t know me, you don’t know what I’ve been through, what I’m still going through, you have no idea how unlucky I’ve been with everything, how many times I’ve tried and have only been hurt over and over again as a result. Let me make this clear: I did not fucking ask to be stuck in this “self limiting loop” and have been bashing my head against a wall for years desperately trying to get out but can’t, no need to rub salt in my wounds, I’m just asking for your own experiences and perspectives here, nothing more, nothing less, might help, might not, I don’t know.
That aside: thanks for sharing.
I’ve found that small local gyms or martial art schools to be the most welcoming environments if you’re interested in those things and willing to put time into the practice. The people don’t really care about the preexisting societal structure as the school dictates it’s own and everyone is there for the same reason. There are still some shitty groups at predatory institutions so have to watch out for those.