- cross-posted to:
- feminism@beehaw.org
- cross-posted to:
- feminism@beehaw.org
In the hours following former President Donald Trump’s election victory, Google searches related to 4B — a fringe South Korean feminist movement that made a name for itself in the mid to late 2010s — surged in the United States.
I used the term “trad wife like” for a reason. Trad wives are a bit of a meme right now but they’re not the only group where women focus on household chores and raising lots of children. Amish and old order Mennonites, traditional Muslim families (my experience is with Somali families), Hasidic Jews, Mormons as well as lots of traditional Christian groups too.
“Far better deal” is debatable. Amish are pretty famous for offering their children the opportunity to leave and live a modern life among “the English” (their term for non-Amish). Very rarely do they actually follow through on it, as they have everything they need.
I volunteer at an after school homework club run by the local Somali community. I help Somali kids with their homework and have made friends with several people in their community. Their family structures are quite traditional and all of the kids have numerous siblings. They don’t avoid modern technology but their community is so close-knit that they strongly maintain their beliefs and practices.
We gave up a lot to have a culture that “offers a far better deal”: a sense of belonging, a sense of purpose, a connection between the work we do and greater meaning (unlike so many bullshit jobs, when you grow your own food it feels immensely satisfying), large families with close kinship bonds to form a support network, even the help of older siblings helping to raise younger children. Many modern parents struggle tremendously just to raise 1-2 children simply because they’re on their own, with no support network.
Amish, Mennonite, and Mormon women face horrible levels of abuse, including stunning levels of incest. So do trad wives. Why are you ignoring the intrinsic trauma that comes with being enslaved? Women are not immune to this. You can see videos of them hanging themselves from ceiling fans after being sold in marriages.
Many of these communities don’t believe spousal rape is real. Rape is torture, which is why it is used extensively in war. It’s also why victims of rape automatically develop the same brain/PTSD patterns as victims of war.
You are profoundly ignorant of women or even the human condition. Recommend the documentary trio Half the Sky and also the book The Body Keeps the Score.
These people can’t leave their cult communities because they literally lack the life knowledge to do so. That’s actually exactly why cults deprive their members of knowledge. They aren’t staying because they are happier, they stay because otherwise they will lose their family and community due to cult shunning and be alone in a strange world.
And further up, re: “trad wife takeover,” um it’s actually their fascist husbands taking over. Blame the men doing it, not their stupid enslaved wives.