A near-death experience left the actor with a sacred knowledge sure to ruin your plans for the great beyond

  • Mossy Feathers (They/Them)@pawb.social
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    26 days ago

    Tbf, while your heart stopped, you brain didn’t. If your brain had totally stopped then you wouldn’t be here. Not saying anyone’s right or wrong, just pointing out that a stopped heart doesn’t mean that you’re fully dead…

    • jordanlund@lemmy.world
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      26 days ago

      Which is funny, because when we got married, I paid the officiant extra to do the speech… ;)

    • FuglyDuck@lemmy.world
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      25 days ago

      are you really basing your healthcare guidance from an 80’s era comedy?

      still better than american healthcare…

      • Mossy Feathers (They/Them)@pawb.social
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        25 days ago

        No?

        No.

        I have observed that, with enough money, doctors can fix just about any problem you have, except for a dead brain. Can’t breathe? We’ll breathe for you. Can’t digest your food? We’ll do that for you. Heart won’t beat? We even have machines for that. However, if I’m not mistaken, doctors can’t restart a brain after it’s stopped. That’s the one thing that can’t be fixed.

        That said, if your heart has stopped then you’re basically one foot in the grave and will probably die without immediate medical attention (unless you’re like the guy I was replying to, where your heart occasionally just takes a break for a moment). As such, it would be apt to describe you as mostly dead. You’re not beyond saving, but that’s where you’re headed.

        That description reminded me of Miracle Max’s diagnosis of “mostly dead” and so I threw in the gif.

        Happy?

        • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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          25 days ago

          I have observed that, with enough money, doctors can fix just about any problem you have, except for a dead brain.

          Speaking as someone who went to the Mayo Clinic this year, no they can’t.

        • FuglyDuck@lemmy.world
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          25 days ago

          I mean, I mostly wanted to mock our ridiculous healthcare system. It is pretty barbaric, at least when the bills come due.

          • BaroqueInMind@lemmy.one
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            25 days ago

            Even if you had tagged it with the sarcasm, it still wasn’t a funny joke in the slightest. Try again.